Cinderella is More Than a Story

My fabulous personal trainer Nicole Irlbeck wrote this great article on her blog and I wanted to share it with you…

Poor Cinderella. All locked up, treated like a slave by her mean step-mother. She dares to keep her positive attitude while cleaning and befriending the animals. When the prince sends the invitation to the ball, she doesn’t automatically believe she should stay cooped up and hidden. To stay behind with her “unworthy” and “unlovable” self would mean that everything that her step-mother and step-sisters said and believed about her was actually true. So, Cinderella does everything possible, to get to where she knows she is invited and to arrive where she ultimately belongs. It is a beautiful story of a woman who has a such a core belief in her value and worth that she disregards her circumstances. In the end, her dreams come true.

How many of us can say that we ignore our circumstances, what others say about us, or even what we might have been told from a loved one in order to rise up to live out what we know to be our strengths? My 10 year old niece recently auditioned for the role of Cinderella. She has always been a dramatic girl, and has a definite talent for the stage. Courageously, she stepped into her version of Cinderella…and got the part. She stood up in an audition and boldly believed she could be the lead character in a play. No negative thoughts to hold her back. No limiting beliefs about how she might fail, or screw up, or not be good enough, or that someone else was better than her. She believed in the magic of who she inherently is.

How are you stepping into your part? Do you face each day with dread for the duties you have agreed to that don’t really matter to you? Who are you trying to please in your life? I challenge you to release your strengths and start living out of your inherent gifts, talents, and beauty. You are needed. Your life is special.

Try this meditation…
1) Picture yourself as Cinderella. Where are you in her story? Are you…

• sulking in the tower?
• frantically trying to clean and be friendly to help make yourself feel more adequate?
• finding the joy in life as you embrace your essence?

2) What are you doing with your invitation to the ball? Are you…

• becoming bitter and angry as you compare your life to those around you who seem to have it “together”?
• squelching your heart to keep the peace around you and maintain the status quo?
• stepping out in faith and living with confidence that you are loved, needed, and worthy?

3) How are you responding to your lost slipper, or the inevitable reality that life is hard even when your dreams and desires are strong? Are you…

• Striving harder and expecting more out of yourself and others
• Giving up and letting go of hope
• Finding new ways daily to expect only good regardless of your current circumstance

You may think Cinderella was unrealistic to believe in her dreams of a better life. But, the alternative is to believe that life will never change. Which will you embrace in the new decade to come? You already have the lead role in your story, how will your story unfold in 2010?

“A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you’re fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish for, you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
the dream that you wish will come true”
-Cinderella Poor Cinderella. All locked up, treated like a slave by her mean step-mother. She dares to keep her positive attitude while cleaning and befriending the animals. When the prince sends the invitation to the ball, she doesn’t automatically believe she should stay cooped up and hidden. To stay behind with her “unworthy” and “unlovable” self would mean that everything that her step-mother and step-sisters said and believed about her was actually true. So, Cinderella does everything possible, to get to where she knows she is invited and to arrive where she ultimately belongs. It is a beautiful story of a woman who has a such a core belief in her value and worth that she disregards her circumstances. In the end, her dreams come true.

How many of us can say that we ignore our circumstances, what others say about us, or even what we might have been told from a loved one in order to rise up to live out what we know to be our strengths? My 10 year old niece recently auditioned for the role of Cinderella. She has always been a dramatic girl, and has a definite talent for the stage. Courageously, she stepped into her version of Cinderella…and got the part. She stood up in an audition and boldly believed she could be the lead character in a play. No negative thoughts to hold her back. No limiting beliefs about how she might fail, or screw up, or not be good enough, or that someone else was better than her. She believed in the magic of who she inherently is.

How are you stepping into your part? Do you face each day with dread for the duties you have agreed to that don’t really matter to you? Who are you trying to please in your life? I challenge you to release your strengths and start living out of your inherent gifts, talents, and beauty. You are needed. Your life is special.

Try this meditation…
1) Picture yourself as Cinderella. Where are you in her story? Are you…

• sulking in the tower?
• frantically trying to clean and be friendly to help make yourself feel more adequate?
• finding the joy in life as you embrace your essence?

2) What are you doing with your invitation to the ball? Are you…

• becoming bitter and angry as you compare your life to those around you who seem to have it “together”?
• squelching your heart to keep the peace around you and maintain the status quo?
• stepping out in faith and living with confidence that you are loved, needed, and worthy?

3) How are you responding to your lost slipper, or the inevitable reality that life is hard even when your dreams and desires are strong? Are you…

• Striving harder and expecting more out of yourself and others
• Giving up and letting go of hope
• Finding new ways daily to expect only good regardless of your current circumstance

You may think Cinderella was unrealistic to believe in her dreams of a better life. But, the alternative is to believe that life will never change. Which will you embrace in the new decade to come? You already have the lead role in your story, how will your story unfold in 2010?

“A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you’re fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish for, you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
the dream that you wish will come true”
-Cinderella

Mr. Maxwell Mittens

Mr. Maxwell Mittens

Christmas is a big deal at our house.  We love decking the halls and spoiling the children.  We don’t “do” Santa.  We spend our hard earned money of gifts for the kids and I don’t want some obese grandpa taking all the credit!

A couple of years ago, for some long forgotten reason, we came up with this idea that we had an elf living in our attic.  His name is Mr. Maxwell Mittens.  (I found this cartoon elf created by Dagan Moriarty that fit just perfectly!)   The poor little fella isn’t that great at toy making and he burned all the cookies when he tried to work in a tree, so he lives in our attic.  He doesn’t give gifts, but he creates elaborate scavenger hunts every year for the twins.  (They know he isn’t real, but have a tremendous amount of fun, anyway!)  When the girls wake up Christmas morning, there is glitter and streamers and confetti all around the door to the attic.  After reading the Christmas story and slowly tormenting the children by developing patience in their character, they begin to open their presents.  We handle this part differently every year, but sometimes all their presents are hidden and they just find the first clue in their stockings.  Last year, we had them open half of their presents in the morning and then after lunch the alarm clock went off in their room and there was a glittery envelope from Mr. Max with a clue where to find more toys.    Some clues are a series of math problems, word searches or riddles.  The hunt takes them at least an hour and is a fun way to prolong the fun.

Jeff and I spend weeks planning elaborate ways to change it up every year…this year we will have a short hunt in the morning (so they will think it is over) and then another one in the afternoon.  It’s so fun and the whole family participates!

So why am I sharing this family tradition with you?  Did you notice that there is no food in this story?  No cookies, no fudge, no mints, no cheese balls?  I’m working on creating memories for my daughters that don’t wrap eating up with love and holidays.  I know we all have special foods that we eat at Christmas and I know that is normal and healthy, but EVERY memory should not be coated in powered sugar!

Merry Christmas!  

Denver Zoo Lights (and no regrets from dinner)

It was my mom’s birthday this week so we planned a fun, family night out.  We took her to dinner at an Italian restaurant and then to the Denver Zoo for Zoo Lights.  While out for dinner I ate ravioli and 2 glasses of very cheap red wine.  It was great!  At the Zoo Lights I had a handful of the kid’s cotton candy.  (Also great and sticky!)

As anyone who has ever dieted knows, this is the most difficult time of the year.

Nana and the Twins

  With parties and fun “once a year” activities like these there are reasons to fall off the wagon (or outright quit) at every turn.  Everywhere I go someone hands me a wine glass and fills it up, and I’ve never been one to turn down free booze!  It’s tough to balance living in the moment and enjoying today with my long term goals.  To be honest I’m just trying to get through the next week.  Really?  Is that what I’m doing?  Just rushing through the season hoping to make it to the other side smaller? Hmmm.

Nope!  I’m enjoying the festivities with no regrets!  I’m saying “No, thank you.” To the things that aren’t that great, but to lots of treats I’m just holding out my glass and saying “Thanks!”  I know that after the holidays I’ll get my second wind and be ready to put my nose to the grindstone and give this 110%.  (Is that enough with the metaphors or what?)  Enjoying life without legalism, guilt or shame is part of this journey.  Learning to truly change my relationship with food and exercise means eating brownies and drinking wine.  It also means making choices when it’s tough and not beating myself up when I make mistakes.

Yep, the weight loss may be slow, but I am learning and changing.  Cotton candy is no reason to hate yourself!

(In other news, my wedding ring fit this week for the first time in 4 years!  No more picking up strangers in bars for me!) 

My Hubby and Me

Sunday Morning Weight Update…

So, drumroll, my weight update for today is… none of your business!

Ha.  Just kidding.  Actually I’m feeling the need to try something a little different partway through my health and fitness campaign.  You see, it’s easy to let the numbers start driving you rather than the behaviors and the lifestyle.  I’m finding that my greatest concerns are accountability to everyone else and the monstrous power of THE SCALE.  That seems inherently wrong, and it concerns me for later.  What if I find that when this is all over and the external support and the public eye are pulled away I can’t sustain my efforts on my own?  A scary thought!

And so I’m going to try a little experiment before that fateful day comes.  I’m going to pull back from sharing complete details with you, my faithful followers, for just a while.  In fact, my sister and rep Trish is taking myscale away from me.  The HORROR!  This will be my chance to prove that my actions and my progress are all about me, and not anyone else.

Don’t worry – I’ll still be posting great blog content and letting you know what’s going on in my life, but I’m going to focus on behaviors and not numbers.  It will be really interesting for me to see how this trial run for the rest of my life plays out.  Can I do it without you?  I hope so.

Hypnotherapy Vs. the Christmas Cookie Exchange Party

I had hypnotherapy with Jenna Robbert this weekend.  I also attended my sister’s Christmas cookie exchange party.

First of all, it was sick and wrong for my sister to even invite me to her cookie party.  It’s just not enough for her that she is the sweet sister, the smart sister and the pretty sister.  She wants to retain her “thin sister” status as well!  So, she invited me to her evil Christmas party.  I know what you’re thinking: “She probably just invited you because she loves you and wants your company.”   Not true!  But enough about my sister…

When I had hypnotherapy that morning with Jenna, she talked me through dealing with the temptations at holiday parties.  “Just imagine what each temptation tastes like.  Enjoy it in your mind so you don’t feel deprived and then move on.” she said.  Now this advice might sound over simplified, but I assure you, it works!  I made it through the party unscathed!  I had one glass of wine and zero cookies.  That’s right, zero!  Suck on that, Sister!

Hypnotherapy is a super relaxing was to change your inner dialog.  I’ve really enjoyed working with Jenna and can see the results after each session.  I never realized how negative I can be about this whole journey!   Jenna is helping me to heal inside, and God bless her for that!

(Maybe one day Jenna can help my wicked sister.)

Stress and the Benefits of Massage

I had another wonderful massage this morning from Julie Webster. Massage is not only relieving the neck and back pain brought on by all the exercise I’m doing, but is also seriously reducing my stress levels!  Julie wrote this wonderful article on stress and massage therapy that I wanted to share with you.  I highly recommend including massage as a part of your exercise regime.  I couldn’t work my muscles nearly as hard without Julie’s expert hands unfolding them and putting them back in place!  Thanks Julie!

Stress and the Benefits of Massage by Julie Webster

Julie Webster

Stress is just part of living.  Some stress is good.  This type of stress is called “eustress” and results in things like motivation, feelings of excitement and improving performance.  The other, more common type of stress  is “distress” which can initially cause the same response but over time plays havoc on our bodies.  (To learn more about this type of stress read, The Effects of Stress.)

In this prolonged situation of distress, we tend to hold our bodies in a tight or contracted state.  Our breath shortens and our muscles start to ‘hold’ onto that tightness.  Often we carry our stress in certain parts of our bodies.  The more common areas are shoulders/neck, low back and the abdominal area. 

At first we don’t really pay much attention to the fact that we are tightening that area.  It is at an unconscious level.  However over time those muscles that are continually contracted start to cause us pain or discomfort.  Hopefully this wakes us up! 

The cycle looks something like this: 

• We become stressed out about something.
• We then hold tension unconsciously in certain muscles. 
• Those muscles are contracting for an extended period of time. 
• The more they contract, the more waste products they produce. 
• Meanwhile, when they contract, they limit the amount of blood that flows to them.  This is known as vasoconstriction.
• Since there is a lack of blood flowing to the muscle, the waste products cannot be flushed out but rather accumulate in the tissues. 
• This causes an irritation to the nerve endings and the result is PAIN.
• Along with pain comes more tension.
• Then the cycle continues to move beyond the original tight muscles into the surrounding muscles.  This is the body’s way of protecting itself.
• Those muscles start to stay contracted and the pattern starts all over again in those outlying muscles.

As you can see, this cycle can go on and on.  In addition to pain, often we end up with other symptoms like headaches, numbness, fatigue, weakness, stomach aches, or shortness of breath; just to name a few.  Over an even longer period of time, say months or years, we start to develop symptoms that lead us to believe something bigger is wrong with us.  At this point it can be incredibly difficult to reverse this process and yet not impossible by any means.

This is where therapeutic massage comes in. 

Massage that works on a level deep enough to affect the tightness (without going too deep) can be very beneficial.  It assists in bringing fresh blood to the tissues thus allowing the waste products to move out while at the same time bringing nutrients to the muscles to help them heal.  It also works on a neurological level to affect the proprioceptors. 

Proprioceptors are found throughout our entire body.  The ones located in the muscles act as messengers to the brain to tell it to either shut off the contraction or to turn it on; depending on which proprioceptors we are talking about.  Those found in the tendons, near the insertion of the muscle into the bone, are called Golgi Tendon Organs or GTO’s.  Their work is specifically to help the muscles relax by sending messages to the brain to stop the contraction within the muscle.  This is just one simple example in a very complex situation.

In addition to the physical therapeutic benefits of massage there is the emotional.  Often along with stress comes a hurried life with little to no time to stop and take care of ourselves.  The more we push to avoid the situation, the more we create the havoc.  Therefore by allowing oneself time to rest and receive nurturing touch from a professional becomes a necessity rather than a luxury. 

If you have never experienced this type of massage I encourage you to do so.  If you have and yet do not make the time in your hurried life, I also encourage you to do so.  I have been a Certified Massage Therapist for almost 20 years.  To this day I am still amazed at the change is someone’s face, how they carry themselves (shoulders no longer up to their ears, for example), and the type energy they have after receiving a deep tissue massage.  I see them breathe more deeply and take a moment to sit and relax.  Often they seem like an entirely different person than the one that arrived!  Clearly we are not talking about luxury but something very important for our overall health.

I live in Boulder, Colorado where we are fortunate enough to have a great number of skilled professionals.  If you live in an area where your resources are limited, you might consult one of the following associations to find someone in your area.  

• National Certification Board for Therapeutic Massage and Bodyworkers
• American Massage Therapy Association
• Associated Bodywork and Massage Professionals

This is a gift to give to yourself or to those whom you love!

For more questions, feel free to email me at info@julie-webster.com and I will try to answer your questions.

Weight Update

I lost 2 pounds this week!

Current Weight: 228

Shopping at Whole Foods with Louise Ross

This week I went on a shopping excursion with Louise Ross (from Market To Mouth) at Whole Foods in Boulder.

Louise Ross

  Louise describes herself as ”Whole Foods’ official “Unofficial” recession-strategy blogger.”  Louise gives great tips on grocery shopping on a budget and applies a no waste, no fuss approach to healthy cooking.  Her website is packed full of great healthy recipes and tips on saving money on organic, gourmet cuisine. 

One of the biggest reasons I wanted to shop Whole Foods with Louise, is that I knew she would have lots of new ideas to jazz up my mundane meals.  Let’s face it, when you’re on a diet for any length of time (and for me this is a permanent change) you tend to eat the same foods over and over again!  Louise helped me step outside the box and choose foods I haven’t used lately (or ever). I must confess: I’m a coupon clipper.  I usually save 40-60% off my grocery bill every week at Safeway or King Soopers.  For my family of 5 on a tight budget, Whole Foods can’t be my “regular” grocery store.  What I learned from Louise is that Whole Foods offers better prices on some things than I was paying elsewhere (when I use Louise’s tips for savings) and purchasing organic produce, fresh fish and grains in bulk at Whole Foods can actually save me money! 

Louise is writing about our shopping trip this week on her blog Market To Mouth.  She talks more about some things we bought and ways to prepare them.  You’ll love the pictures of me in my “bag lady coat” too!  I can’t help it; it was only 5 degrees that morning!

Gingerbread Nightmare

Last year's Gingerbread Crack-House.

The kids made a gingerbread house this weekend.  They had a great time….me, not so much. 

The house did turn out better than last year’s.  Last Christmas we couldn’t get the walls to stand up so the house was condemned. (Notice the snowman crushed under a wall with red icing for blood…at least we were creative!)

When the gingerbread house was nearly collapsing under the weight of candy canes and gumdrops, I sent the kids upstairs to change and clean themselves up.  I tackled the scene of the crime.  There was so much icing on the dining room and kitchen floors that I had to lay soaking wet towels on the tile floor for a few minutes just to soften the sugar enough to begin scrubbing it off!  By the time the kitchen, dining room and children were clean, I was not. 

Gingerbread House 2009. Much better than last year's!

When my husband came home and saw me he said, “Looks like you fell off the wagon in a big way today.”  I was true.  I had gumdrops and hard candies stuck in my hair, icing smears from head to toe shimmering with sugar sprinkles and a light overall dusting of powered sugar.

Is it possible to absorb calories through the skin? 

If so, I’m screwed.

Sunday Weight Update

Grrrr.  I gained a pound this week.

Current Weight: 230

I think it’s time to cut my calories again.  I still have one week left on my cleanse and the cleanse itself is 450 calories per day.  The only thing I can figure out is that with the extra calories from the cleanse I’m eating too much food.  I can still meet my goal this month if I can get a handle on this.  I will not beat myself up over it.  I will not beat myself up.  I will not beat myself up!